Persephone was a cute pregnant lady. I gained a lot of weight. All of a sudden, I was slightly rotund.
We took a tour of the hospital's birthing center. The tour leader kept referring to "vag delivery." In the anonymous survey afterwards, I wrote, "The tour sounded like the dialog of a bad porno."
Our birthing class was taught by our sister-in-law who told us that, despite what you see on TV, rarely is the first sign of labor having your water break. But one Friday morning Persephone was getting ready to go to Target and her water broke. I left work and took her to the hospital. She was having no contractions but Crazy Jane was now exposed to the outside world, so Persephone would have to be induced. They hooked her up to Petocin and left us with a TV. It was sooooooooo boring.
Since nothing was going on, I left. I went to get something to eat, then I stopped by the store to get Persephone a book to read. When I got back, she had started having contractions in my absence and was sort of bitter about it.
She got an epidural that didn't work. The anesthesiologist came back and yelled at her (and didn't fix it). She labored all night. Crazy Jane was born around 6 AM on Saturday. About an hour later they moved us to a recovery room, where the tour leader came to passive-aggressively confront us about our responses to the anonymous survey.
About a month later, friends of ours who had a vacation home near Yosemite let us go there for a weekend. It was a brand new home, and while we were washing our sheets before leaving the final day, the sewer line backed up into the house. We got it under control, but we had to report back to them that we flooded their house. It turned out to not be our fault--the septic contractor hadn't turned on either of the two leach fields, so sewage went down the pipe to the junction and then stopped. We were the unfortunate users who were there when the backup reached the house. But we still got spooked by it and have never again used friends' houses while they weren't there.
That Christmas we flew to Virginia for a family gathering at my sister's house.
via oneofthebest
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